The 9 Types of People You SHOULD NOT Date

It’s common knowledge that dating today can be as tricky as it is exciting. While there's no one-size-fits-all rule for finding the right partner, there are certain types of personality types that often signal trouble ahead. Recognizing these red flags early on can save you from potential heartache later on and steer you towards healthier, more fulfilling relationships. Here’s a quick guide on the types of people you might want to avoid when dating.

1. The Eternal Commitment-Phobe

• Who They Are: This person avoids any talk of commitment or labels, even after months of dating.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Changes the subject when future plans are discussed.

  • Avoids defining the relationship or giving it a label.

  • Has a history of short-term relationships or flings.

  • Shows reluctance to make joint long-term plans.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: A relationship is a two-way street. If you’re looking for stability and they can’t commit, it’s likely you’ll end up feeling unfulfilled and frustrated.

2. The Green-Eyed Monster

• Who They Are: They exhibit extreme jealousy, even if you're just chatting with a friend, that often leads to controlling behavior.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Frequently questions your whereabouts and company.

  • Displays controlling behavior over social interactions.

  • Reacts negatively to time spent away from them.

  • May check your phone or online activities without consent.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: While a hint of jealousy can be normal, extreme cases of excessive jealousy can lead to toxic dynamics in a relationship. Be particularly cautious if you see these signs before you are in a committed relationship. This excessive jealousy often stems from deep-seated insecurities or trust issues and can result in controlling and manipulative behavior.

3. The Ghoster

• Who They Are: They disappear without any communication, only to reappear as if nothing happened.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Communication is sporadic and unpredictable.

  • Disappears after deep or emotional conversations.

  • Avoids addressing their absences when they return.

  • Shows a pattern of avoiding conflict or serious discussions.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: Communication is key in any relationship. If someone routinely ghosts you, it shows a lack of respect and communication skills, vital components of a healthy partnership.

4. The Constant Critic

• Who They Are: This person always finds something to criticize about you, from your choices to your appearance.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Makes frequent negative comments about your appearance, job, or hobbies.

  • Often disguises criticism as jokes or 'helpful' advice.

  • Rarely compliments you or acknowledges your strengths.

  • Criticizes your friends or family members.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: Constructive criticism is one thing, but constant criticism can create a toxic environment and take a toll on your self-esteem and well-being. A partner should uplift you, not bring you down.

5. The Self-Absorbed Individual

• Who They Are: Their conversations and concerns mostly revolve around themselves.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Dominates conversations with their own stories and issues.

  • Shows little interest in your life or feelings.

  • Makes decisions based primarily on their own needs.

  • Rarely acknowledges or addresses your needs.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: A relationship involves sharing and mutual care. If someone is overly self-centered, it can lead to a one-sided relationship where your needs and feelings are overlooked.

6. The Secretly-Taken Charmer

• Who They Are: They seem single and ready to mingle but are secretly in a committed relationship.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Often vague about their personal life and availability.

  • Avoids public places or certain social settings with you.

  • Hesitant to introduce you to friends or family.

  • Communication patterns may be irregular or secretive.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: Honesty and integrity are the bedrocks of any relationship. If they're keeping their current relationship a secret, it's a major red flag about their trustworthiness. Engaging with someone who is not transparent about their relationship status can lead to emotional turmoil and a complicated, painful situation. 

7. The Love Bomber

• Who They Are: They shower you with intense affection and promises early on, only to pull back suddenly.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Intense affection and attention right from the start.

  • Quick to make grand romantic gestures or promises.

  • May pressure for a serious commitment too quickly.

  • Often creates a sense of dependency or intense emotional attachment.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: Love bombing can be a manipulative tactic. It creates an emotional rollercoaster, often leaving you confused and vulnerable in an unhealthy, imbalanced relationship dynamic. 

8. The Ghost of Exes Past

• Who They Are: Their ex(es) seem(s) to be a constant presence in their life, either in conversation or in person.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Frequently brings up their ex in conversations.

  • Maintains regular contact with their ex beyond a healthy or necessary level.

  • Compares your relationship with their past one.

  • Shows signs of unresolved feelings towards their ex.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: It’s important to move past previous relationships before starting a new one. If they’re constantly bringing up or hanging out with their ex, it could mean they’re not fully ready to move on.

9. The Gaslighter

• Who They Are: They manipulate situations to make you question your own reality or sanity.

• How to Recognize Them:

  • Denies or twists conversations that you clearly remember.

  • Makes you question your feelings and sanity.

  • Dismisses your emotions as overreactions.

  • Often leaves you feeling confused with feelings of self-doubt.

• Why You Should Avoid Them: Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse. It undermines your self-esteem and can leave you feeling isolated and dependent. A healthy relationship should be built on trust, respect, and honesty, not manipulation.

Dating can be a complex process, where understanding who to avoid is just as important as knowing what you’re looking for. Recognizing unhealthy personality types can help you avoid painful interactions and eventually find your way to a healthier and happier relationship. Remember, it’s not just about finding a partner; it’s about investing your time and energy with the right person who can partner with you in the creation of a happy, healthy connection. Trust your instincts, and don’t ignore the red flags.

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